During a conversation with one of my aunts, I told her this lesson I learned. I felt that it could help her, as she is burdened by problems.
The more you spend time burdened with problems, the less time you spend giving gratitude to the Higher Power for solving them…
Take it from me. I’ve been through hell and back… thrice.
Had fun with my friends last weekend, my weekend that spilled out into early Monday morning.
This is us at our last stop: Vic’s place.
I looked like I was cut-out off another picture and pasted here.
Believe me when I say that I am the only single guy in this group.
(I really look like a cut out)
Which begs the question: Isn’t it time for me to wander out? I am asking this question more often these days. Haaays, that’s the problem of The Formidable, everything to you is temporary. You are always aware that you are alone at some level.
Maybe I’ll use The Secret to provide me with the answers of which path to take. Anyway, I feel that the Law of Attraction, you know, The Secret… is already in action.
LOA – Law of Attraction
Had this conversation with AJ this evening
Maybe he’s right.
I know, lame title.
I’m looking into getting a new set of travel bags for my imminent deployment, or shall we say, my Great Equalizer. I’ll explain why I call it that in the next few entries. 
I’m thinking of getting the Waxwear Soft Duffle by Jack Spade.
It’s in chocolate with striped lining. I’m loving it. :D
I just hope it’s at the Jack Spade store in Greenbelt 3 though. And the price? Well, I don’t want to get flogged by the price police. It’s definitely not affordable, but attainable.
Since I’m already using The Secret to make my trip a reality, why not put this as an add-on?
For some reason today, I could not truly concentrate when I tried to get into meditative state this morning. Maybe it’s because my heart was wounded from a recent encounter. It shouldn’t have happened, if I had the will to quell the feeling. Besides, I already have someone else who is more… emotionally available.
Yet again, my heart failed to receive the memo re: every fiber of being to move on. haaay
I don’t even find this person worth holding on to anymore… being someone who can’t distinguish between acknowledging one’s feelings and crossing the line. There is a difference… Love is, after all, an inexhaustible resource. People can always create as much as they need.
A strong will to make things happen, and a mind closed from this distraction… these things I ask from the Universe. I want to wake up one day and not feel anything about this predicament.
I just had the smoothest week of my life. Perhaps it’s because the Universe finally granted me serenity, after my decision to weather the storm, in silence…
Sure, work gave some difficulty, but work will always be what it is – exciting. I still found time to laugh about it. But it ended on a good note… with me having to decide between two great career paths. Both of which would send me off into another adventure… proverbially and geographically speaking… 
Even the commute around the Metro didn’t pose any problems for me. I pictured how my day outside would unfold, and I got it, The Secret style…
And the dating scene… my so-called lovelife… oh so colourful…
Even friendships grew the way I wanted them to. There’s a whole new level of honesty in one of my friendships…
FRIENDS… they make my life better each day.
I hope everyone had a weekend as great as mine!
When I asked the Universe for love and friendship, I had hoped for the best. But when it came to me, my life was thrown in turmoil… and I have been flung left and right, getting hurt in more ways than one.
Maybe they’re right. You get trampled on when you bow to make peace. I am not a humble person, yet I choose humility in times of arguments… You get abused when you are generous. I am not giving by nature, yet I choose “giving” as my mantra in life…. And friendships… Friendships don’t always give you what you want…
I feel like there’s this big proverbial joke being played on me…
Just today, after a bad start, a bicycle zooms in and hits me on the side on my way to work. I just cannot believe it… The Universe just sent a bike to hit me when I’m down!
“I just cannot believe this!”, I thought in that moment. That’s it! I’m on strike! I’m staying put until the Universe turns my luck around.
“I always wanted a happy ending… Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity.”
-Gilda Radner
I always say that uncertainty is one of my least liked feelings. But sometimes, when in the middle of that murky cloud, a ray of clarity breaks through. Then I see, in that one moment, that uncertainty also means possibilities… countless possibilities…
I just realized today that to finally attract that feeling of forgiveness, maybe I should do the act first… outwardly. If I bury the hatchet verbally, then maybe the concept will permeate into my own being.
By the law of attraction, I trust that I will acquire it soon enough.
A seed needs to break ground inorder to flourish, after all.
The Secret says that when you focus on something, by the Law of Attraction, you will acquire it. In this case, I focused on abundance…
Abundance in friendships, among other things, that’s what I’m thankful for.
Of all the days, bakit now pa ako naging idle?!
The universe just moved things and circumstances so that I would be left to wallow in the proverbial goo of misery and heartache this afternoon. Argh! My would-be interviewees decided to come earlier than expected such that I have a huge hole in my schedule. What do I do?
With nothing to do, I rummaged through my bag and chanced upon a piece of receipt that the-source-of-my-miseries signed. “Put Tang in a glass naman o”, I muttered under my breath. “Why do I have to love you, when I don’t even like you anymore”, I wondered almost loudly. I want out of this paradoxical situation, else I will implode.
I’m rambling again…
I must step back from all of this, because if I focus on it then it’ll stick on me like bird’s poo.
Coming from a stroll at Trinoma, I was dropped off by my favorite couple at our house at around ten last night. Trinoma being Triangle North of Manila, is way up north and I being a southerner from Paranaque, that it was such a long trip for them to trek. This couple is just so nice. As I stepped out of the car and into our compound’s gate, I noticed a white cat sitting on my driveway. I thought it was my cat Mu, but like so many in my life, he had already passed on some time ago. His eyes gleamed pink, and so I finally saw the difference. Mu’s eyes were pink and blue. I couldn’t find the cat this morning.
I have been asking for a sign if the path I’m taking right now is the right one for me. I now know that the path of the truth is the most difficult to take, but ultimately it is what’s right. The path of the truth is the path of heart, after all.
—
The Gratitudes
Thank you for old friends.
Thank you for the gift of truth
that I can finally share with them.Thank you for new friends.
Thank you for that one cathartic moment
that made one realize faults.Thank you for the love,
the hurt, and all the other emotions.
Thank you for the the circumstances
that plucked me out of my half-life.Thank you for the signs,
the realizations, and the moments of clarity.
Thank you for the gift of learning.Thank you for the priceless experiences.
Thank you for the life
that is ever so colourful.-by midnight anxiety, October 7, 2007
These last couple of weeks, I have been using this statement, or a permutation thereof, a lot:
What you told me hurts, but that is the truth and I cannot deny that. The truth is always a good thing. Thank you.
I have always valued the truth, especially in the past two years since my mother’s passing. During that time when the power to decide over all of the family’s affairs were turned over to me, I only asked one thing from my family and the people who were involved with us. That is to tell me the whole truth and let not one fact be hidden from me, so that I may make all my decisions based on them. That’s when I started to really believe in the power and absoluteness of what is true.
Throughout this time, in all my contemplative moments, I have always asked the universe for clarity… or truth. Even when I opened my heart to love, I asked for nothing else BUT the truth. In this quest, the universe has put circumstances in front of me that grants me this wish everytime. I always find myself at the right place, at the right time. Today, is no different…
Today, the truth sliced through me like a cold blade.
I accept this gift, and trust that there is a reason for all of this.
Maybe next time I’ll be wise to ask for happiness… bliss.
To wake up and find yourself leaning against the sinews of all your heart’s desires, that’s warmth.
I threw a net unto the sea
But then I caught three
Souls that fates wove to my life’s strands
The meek, the kiss, and the hand-midnight anxiety, September 27, 2005
To wake up one day and feel that with unyielding faith, the love that you asked for, and its consequences, have come full circle… That’s warmth.
I never thought I could find
One soul to surpass the three
I never thought that I could find
A day with so much glee
—
I love this song. It strengthens my belief that things and circumstances come to you when you ask the universe for it.
Love Called My Name by Jodie Brooke-Wilson
Love called my name
I heard the sweetest melody
I felt a change
Down in the deepest part of meIt’s lifted me up so high
Given wings to flyI found a secret place where love grows
Since you showed the way
Love called my name…Love called my name
I heard the voice inside of me
Right through my pain
I saw you there in front of meA vision of paradise
When I look into your eyesI found a secret place where love grows
Since you showed the way
Cause I was lost and now my heart knows
The way home again
Love called my name
I understand now that when I asked for love, I found someone to love. It was not necessary for that love to be reciprocated. The unrequited lover might be deemed by some as the sufferer, but who are we to judge another man’s suffering?
That’s the secret to life.
I’ve always been a giving person, I think, at least outwardly. It must have stemmed from an idea that sprung from my head one contemplative day, that I might not a good person by nature. So to compensate I consciously do the opposite.
Just this week, I gave my friend Chris a 512MB micro SD (No ‘why aren’t you giving it to me!!!’ hate mails please hahaha…. we’re such nerds!). Then a few weeks before I gave a bunch of bags to my cousin. The thought “give to get” was permeating in my mind. I was hoping for an LV bag actually, or the SPF Jacket I saw last Thursday to come my way, but sometimes, the universe proves that the human mind cannot fathom what’s just beyond the horizon.
I come in to work today, a Saturday, holding a latte on one hand, a crepe on the other, a bag on my shoulder, donning a pair of shades and a dirty look… quintessentially my dont- mess-with-me-I’m-working-on-a-Saturday-without-overtime-pay look. My manager happily (and bravely) approaches me, and tells me he has good news. I am completely blown away by the news. Yes, it’s THAT good.
Wow, all of these came out of a microSD and some bags. Thank God!
After staying in Goodland, Buendia (a.k.a. Badlands), we finally moved back to the Net2 Building. No more rickety walls, noisy neighbors and an elevator reminiscent of the movie Shake, Rattle and Roll 1: Refrigerator. As you may have known from my previous posts, I volunteered to coordinate the move. I went to Net2 at 8:30AM on a Saturday (Insert jawdrop here), and immediately saw my nook on the 10th floor. More space!
After a couple of hours of tallying the boxes that came in, we went to Pier One for lunch. I ordered a soda but ended up with a bottle of beer which I gladly didn’t complain to anyone about. When we came back to work, I learned that tally and tipsy rhyme, but thats the only positive thing that I can say about these words when put together.
We eventually survived the moving process. After about a couple of hours, I finally claimed my space at Global City.
I didn’t bring my laptop so I decided to stay and chat with some of my friends. I wanted to confer with them because I found the root of my despair, beyond the heartbreak. My self-esteem issues developed because I felt ugly – definitely the byproduct of the rejection.
But I don’t have that problem now. Thank God!
Coming out of this heartbreak (Yes, I’m on my way out. Thank you.). I learned new things about the facts of love and of myself. Specifically, how much my heart can take. For the sake of process improvement, and because I’m O.C. like crazy, I formulated my rules of disengagement:
Following the sign, I went to A Different Bookstore and bought the book today.
Another thing I attracted. A week or so ago, my friend Rach asked me to get her a bag similar to my Gitara bag. I wished to find something better, and found it sitting right next to the bookstore.
Muslin knockoffs of the Anya Bag! They copied the design detail accurately, I must say.
Today I found myself looking for pictures relating to moths to the flame, and chanced upon this article entitled The Moth and the Flame by Randy Hurlburt. It is coincidentally relating to me, even literally at some points. For the few people who know the things I’ve been going through as of late, it will be hilarious to them. Just goes to show what my heart is screaming, amidst all the chaos in my head. I can build walls in my mind to stop thinking about the person, but by the Law of Attraction, there it is in the article.
Finally I found this pic by xzebulonx on heelpress. Having the human element here is very applicable to me.
I was looking for pictures of such because I felt like one. I went too close to the flame and got burned. The flames are still licking my heart.
Today, I said to a friend: “You know what man, wag mo na problemahin yun (don’t worry about it). Whatever it is you want to happen, I’m sure that you’ve already done your part in the process. Just let the universe take its course. Relax. I’m sure that half of the things you worry about isn’t even in your control.”
In baseball, a pitcher is in his zone when he is only focused on his task: to throw the ball. The position of his body, the swinging of his arm, his grip on the ball… Everything else is just distraction. Once the ball leaves his hands, it’s not up to him anymore. He just makes sure that he threw it right.
When I decided to let the universe flow through me, and accept the gifts of acceptance, friendship, love and all its consequences, I never thought that it would come to me in droves.
With the friendships that I have formed, I know that they are still but diamonds in the rough, but I am happy to see the new piles just the same.
With the falling in love (or like) and getting hurt, I thank God for the experience and the rollercoaster ride. It doesn’t come very often so I relish the feelings.
I thank God for giving me a more accepting heart. I need it to bounce back from every jolt that the universe sends on my way.
Finally, I thank God for giving me the skill and ability to quiet my mind, when I need to. Even the strongest of hearts need a break sometimes.
If there was ever a time that I could say that the Secret worked for me, this is it.
As I prepared for work today, I looked into my closet and decided that I didn’t want to wear my darker clothes. My friend Rachel commented that I should wear brighter colors, since I’m (supposed to be) happier now. I found a Jagthug shirt that I bought months ago but didn’t get to wear. For one, they’re Jagthug, so NOT me. I mean, I didn’t even know there was such a brand until I bought it. Anyway, I am so impartial to wearing white, since I always worry that I would stain them. Still having that worry in mind, I put that shirt on. I just took note that I should be more careful. With my shades in tow, I went out of the hollowed halls to the outside world that is Manila.
Where’s the Law of Attraction in this anecdote, you might say? Here it is. As I stepped out of our gated compound, I felt something fall from the heavens. Well, just about 20 feet above me, a maya decided that the best place to bomb her poop was on my all-new shirt.
A hole-in-one for The Secret Team! :p
Nowadays, I keep a secret shifter’s list to keep me in a happy mood. This is my list, as seen on my Law of Attraction notes:
1. Tink
2.Lindsay Lohan
3. Midnight Anxiety
4. Jack Spade
5. LV
6. Chuvaness
7. Wealth
8. J-o-w-a ko! :)
Whenever something negative is around who might influence my mood, I go through this list. Something in this list is bound to get me back on the good mood train. Using this technique, by the Law of Attraction I attract only good things.
I have formulated an ingenius way to clear my clutter. This method requires a Business Model haha
I’m putting up a new site. Watch out for further details.
Cryptic, cerebral, intruiging, yet exciting at the same time, isn’t it?
This
is mine… And it is on its way!
Gigi, a good friend of mine from my last firm popped me on the net and told me, “Hi! There’s a You know what store here in Hanoi. Want me to buy you something?” My spirit almost jumped out of my body. I gave her the models that I wanted her to check out for me. She’s going home from Hanoi tomorrow.
It is definitely the universe paving the way for me to acquire this… I’m excited!
At TGI Fridays. Nothing unusual, it’s almost an unbloggable event. Except that…
This is when I realized that the gift of you know what has arrived.
Now you might ask, who was the trigger? Parang Cluedo hahaha!!!
In one of my posts some days ago, I asked for understanding. God, in his omnipotence that encompasses all time, already gave me signs of his future gift to me. The sign first came in the form of a cross-stitched picture, a gift for my late mom (by someone I failed to know), that I just had framed a few weeks ago. The picture had an inscription that said: Blessed are the peacemakers. In the same week I received the compound of the sign, when my friend Rach uttered the same phrase. This was in the middle of our conversation about my Elder brother who is avoiding me. I took the signs to heart but I didn’t know if I could muster enough willpower to fix it all.
Then I discovered The Law of Attraction and asked for understanding.
Now, the gift has finally been given to me, in more ways than one. You know when gifts begets other gifts? Or a string of good luck? That’s how it came to me. Something happened to me, or someone did something to me that made me uncomfortable. It was finally clear to me that this someone, whom I have always put in high regard, has flaws too. Flaws that I thought were common sense or basic proper decorum. The mental image I had of this person, once blurred by first impressions, has become clear to me now. Clarity, another form of understanding, I thought then.
I was so inspired about what I had attracted to me, that I began to think about my estranged brother. I finally had the drive to talk to him.
As I put down the phone I knew that it was the right thing to do. I’m glad I did it.
In the midst of the hype of Harry Potter 7, I decided that it was finally time to add the complete set of the books for my collection. Honestly, I haven’t read all of the books. In fact, I only got to read book 1, half of book 2, and book 5. What can I say?
You see, there is always a chance that I lose interest in something, a book or a song, when it becomes famous. That is why I only got to read half of book 2: Harry Potter was crazy famous by then. Everyone who found me weird because I was a bookworm, were suddenly experts in literary art. I kinda felt betrayed, books were my gig (Alright! I was 21! That’s my excuse). You know how it is…
Anyway, the lot of you guys know that I have started applying the Law of Attraction into my life. So in my morning quiet-time, I started picturing the complete hardbound set in my possession. I don’t know if I would get around to reading them. I just want to have the set in my collection.
Last Friday, the executive committee of my company treated us to a meal. It was chaos in the pantry area, but I finally got a seat beside a manager from my batch, Ms. Dinah. I have not talked to her in a while, so we were having an animated conversation to catch up on things. I find her chica btw. My quest for the books came up, and oddly enough, she actually has an extra copy of book 6! What a coincidink?! Who actually has an extra copy, in mint condition no less, of a Harry Potter Book?! Turns out it was a freebie for reserving the final installment of the series.
She offered it to me for 500Php, and actually asked if it was reasonable. What luck?! No, this is not just luck. This is the universe moving circumstance and things to give me what I asked for, nothing less.
As far as the Law of Attraction goes, I am MAGNETO!
I never ordered Vanilla Ice blended from Coffee Bean before. I looked down and saw this.
It is on its way.
I wrote my goals the other day. It’s a list of what I want my self image to be in the future in all aspects: financial, relational, physical, intelectual, and spiritual. At first I had a difficult time, but I was adviced to write what I didn’t want and then traslate it into it’s opposite polarity. The results are my positive goals in life. The key is to embody, as if you already attained them.
I learned that it is unhealthy to keep this survivor attitude of mine. It keeps me from moving forward. Since the universe acts only on what you focus on, there is no room for negative feelings if you want to attain your goals. That is the Law of attraction.
I’ve since then let these positive feelings flow through me. I’m excited.
